Handsome Smirk

This is a (lifelike?) drawing I did of the boy I fancy. Ain't he cute? I like the way his teef and hairs set the tone....and those aren't boar tusks so just stop asking, okay?

Pick Me!

You bet your last nickle I was startled when the nutty grey haired loon sitting across from me on the bus leaned over and wiped her scabby red booger on my shirt. She called me Leroy and told me I deserved it and then twisted her ankle as she hurried off the bus. I proudly wore that booger like a brooch for the rest of the afternoon. It dangled from my breast pocket like a war medal, signifying my ability to cultivate crazy in the most common of conditions. My bus pass doesnt expire till 2012. I should probably invest in some really good laundry detergent or at least carry a wet nap.

Classiness is:

-wearing your pajamas to dinner
-pooping with your bathroom door open
-turning a dust pan into a fancy hat
-going down on Herb Salzman at the Vancouver juggling expo.
-break dancing in a pool of your own blood
-winning a meatloaf shaped like Abe Lincoln in a "cake walk"
-sandy bubblegum
-using poodles instead of tampons
-any excuse to skip a shower
-hand washing your urine stains
-a Lard Puppy Moon Bounce Yachting Club membership
-a pocket full of cake
-a front page cameo in Slammer Magazine
http://www.slammernews.com/back_issues/Phoenix.SlammerVol1Issue21/index.html
-listening to an Alvin and the Chipmunks Christmas album in July in a blow up pool, drinking bud lite, topless, with your fence blown down
-a vagina that doesn't need tending too

HOW CLASSY ARE YOU?